I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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