I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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