i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Randomize
