How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
