you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I currently don't understand fingers.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
