I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Randomize
