Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
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