So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Why are your pants in the freezer?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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