Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
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