I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Randomize
