Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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