Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
