how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Four minutes until I can fart!
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
