at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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