super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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