dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Randomize
