the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize