the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Enjoy the penises
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
