she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
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