dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
