i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
