i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
