Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
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