please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
