hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Randomize