everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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