I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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