Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
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