Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
