belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Randomize
