Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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