Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
