Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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