I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
