yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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