doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I think im going to throw up on grandma
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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