CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
