This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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