guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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