he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
