one two three fourrrrnication!
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I skipped work to stalk him.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
