Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize