Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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