My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
There was a lot of him and a little penis
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
