Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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