Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
