But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Randomize
