yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
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