This is not my ceiling
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
