If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
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